What's going on when mothers are nasty?

What’s going on when mothers are nasty?

The next of our relationship issues involves how parents manage and express their anger.  Our focus on mothers.  Mothers are meant to be kind, gentle and loving.  So what happens when mothers don’t feel like that, or can’t behave as we all expect?

In Scene 3 (of Scrambled), Fiona’s relationship with her son and daughter is quite hostile.  She’s contemptuous of her son’s attempts to teach his sister how to make breakfast, calling her daughter a ‘lazy cow’.  He tries his best to keep the peace and offer support, but she angrily rejects him.  What might cause a mother to treat her children like this?

Why is this relationship issue important?

In the story Scrambled, Fiona feels lost without her husband and stuck in a situation she can do little about.  However, she’s never been good at understanding or managing her feelings, and her anger has often created an unpleasant family atmosphere.  I wonder if anyone has dared tell her how horrible this is to live with?

When we’re angry it’s easy to lash out at those who are too fearful or powerless to protest, and never to learn the impact this has.  The result is domestic or workplace misery.

This relationship issue is important because we all need to get better at:

  • knowing when we’re angry and identifying why
  • expressing feelings in a way that’s respectful
  • challenging one another’s behaviour.
What’s going on when mothers are nasty? (pdf)
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Fiona: You’re wasting your breath, she’s a lazy cow!

Maureen: Mooo

John: She needs encouragement…we all need encouragement

Maureen: You’re wasting your time, she does exactly what she wants to do, which is nothing indegenerique.be!